New Year’s Self Talk

It is a brand new year! Everything is fresh, unspoiled and the possibilities are endless.  This is a time for new beginnings – a time to make some needed changes! Or, so we think. Is the New Year really a great time to make personal improvements? Yes, and no. Last year is not really any different from this year. The earth merely completed another orbit around the sun. You basic convictions have not changed. The major influences in your life are not altered. Are they?  

If I were to ask you who is the major influence in your life what would you say?  You might say “Jesus,” or “The Bible,” because I am a pastor and that is the expected answer.  But think about it for a minute. Really think. Perhaps you might mention an author that you read, a parent or grandparent that really loved you, or a friend, etc.  But, I think that answer lies closer to home. You are you own greatest influencer.  Your ‘self-talk’ determines your choices in life as well as if you will ever change for the better.

There is something of a slogan in Biblical Counseling circles. “What is your problem? You are. And that means there is hope.” In more directly Biblical terms, “What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts,… envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person” (Mark 7:20-23). You are your own worst enemy. And yet, you can become your own best friend.

Have you examined your self-talk lately? What do you say to yourself doubt God and yourself? What you really believe about you – your weaknesses, abilities, limitations, or vast potential – largely determines the course and trajectory of your life. “The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45).

You are in a continuous conversation with yourself, analyzing and interpreting past events, your present circumstances, and determining what you should do, or say, next.  Your self-talk is the command and control center of your life.  So, how do you talk to yourself?  Do you spend your thought-life defending and excusing your past behavior and generating excuses for your future failures? Or, do you speak truth, and then grace to yourself? What do you tell yourself about God, the others around you, and your present circumstances? Is your conversation grace-based, God-centered, and gospel infused? Do you regularly remind yourself of the beauty and loving kindness of your God and your need of and delight in Him? Do you include Him in on your conversations?

Put God back in the center of your thinking. Have Him as the substance of your self-conversation. Romans 12:2 commands, “be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God.” Do that, and you will have a Happy New Year!